Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Fulfilling My Own Prophecy

So the other day, I talked about how I must be getting old because the TV shows from my childhood were about to debut on the new version of "Nick at Nite." I also jokingly referenced the fact that Nirvana is now considered to be "classic rock."

Imagine my surprise when I found out that Nirvana isn't only a "classic," it's Vintage. Did you know that?


It must be true, because Target says so.

ZOMG!!1!!!!1! 1993. Nineteen ninety effing THREE! I can just imagine the teenagers back-to-school-shopping with their moms, ooohing and aaahing over the "vintageness" of this faded old Nirvana t-shirt. I mean, they weren't even BORN yet! It would be way rad if they wore it to school, they would be totally tubularly cool. Majorly awesome. Cowabunga! What, am I dating myself?

Not only is it vintage, but it's vintageness is on par with The Beatles, who were next to them on the "Vintage Varsity" shelf.

Is this how my own mother felt when I wanted to wear tye-dye Grateful Dead shirts and peace sign necklaces?

To add insult to injury, check out this part of the definition:

vin·tage (vntj)

1. Of or relating to a vintage.
2. Characterized by excellence, maturity, and enduring appeal; classic.
3. Old or outmoded.

(of course, my cynical eyes skim right over the second usage. you bet I'm excellent, mature, and enduringly appealing.)


  1. I did not know this and I was just the famous french market Target.
    "tubularly cool" - I'm very glad that one didn't last.
    (oh what's the Z before Oh My God stand for?  Zooie Zoom?)

  2. "Tubular" was pretty awful, wasn't it? I can't say it in my head without thinking of Ninja Turtles, either.

    On ZOMG: a Derivative of the Internet shorthand term
    OMG. The term is commonly used to express humorously overwrought
    excitement and as a way of mocking internet slang as a whole, and is
    most likely representative of pushing the Shift key over-zealously and
    sloppily, thus pushing the "Z" key in the process, on a QWERTY
    keyboard. It has appeared on various websites and message boards,
    often associated with a "witty" remark or trolling, and was spotted in
    use as early as 1996. It is reasonably widespread today in the online
    Anime and gaming communities, and is often used in its more ironic
    sense on internet pop-culture forums such as Fark.



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